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Sports Jokes
Sports gave dad jokes two of their finest inventions: the hat trick pun and the hole-in-one. Hockey leads this shelf, as it should in Canada, with baseball, soccer, golf, tennis, and the rest of the lineup close behind. Tap any card for the punchline.
Why did the hockey player bring string to the rink?
In case the game needed to be tied.
What do hockey players and magicians have in common?
They both pull off hat tricks.
Why did the soccer ball quit the team?
It was tired of getting kicked around.
Why do basketball players avoid vacations during the season?
They'd be called for travelling.
What has eighteen legs and catches flies all summer?
A baseball team.
Why did the golfer pack two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
Why is tennis such a noisy game?
Every player raises a racket.
What do boxers like to read before a big match?
The punch lines.
Why are fish terrible at basketball?
They're scared of the net.
Why did the bowling pins refuse to play?
They'd gone on strike.
Why do skiers make poor comedians?
All of their jokes go downhill.
How do runners stay cool during a summer race?
They stand next to their fans.
Why are fish so easy to weigh?
They carry their own scales.
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
He needed his quarter back.
What do you call a pig on a basketball team?
A ball hog.
Why did the racing bicycle finally stop?
It was two-tired.
Why did the soccer goalie carry a notebook?
To keep a perfectly clean sheet.
Why do baseball players make such good bakers?
They really know their batter.
What game do cows play at birthday parties?
Moo-sical chairs.
Why did the football player sign up for art class?
He wanted to learn how to draw a play.
What do marathon runners do when their memory lapses mid-race?
They jog it.
Why did the volleyball player bring a net to the beach?
He wanted to get everything set up ahead of time.
What does “love” mean in tennis?
Absolutely nothing — and the players are fine with that.
What do you call a hockey player with a hit song?
A puck-star.
Why did the stadium get so warm after the game ended?
All the fans had gone home.
Telling them well
Timing is everything: tell the stadium joke (number 25) in the car on the way home from an actual game, while everyone is still in the mood to argue about the score.
More shelves
25 jokes on this one — 25 waiting on each of the others.